Perspective

There are countless things that I want to do in my life. Places I want to go yet, places I want to go to yet again. Pictures I want to take, books I want to write. I don't feel like I'm anywhere near finished with what I want to accomplish in this life that God gave to me. But yet, if my life was over today, I'm content with what I have done. I'm in a good place.

Don't misunderstand me to say that life is perfect. Times are hard and life can be a struggle from one minute to the next. I do recognize, however, that my hard times can not compare to many of the worlds hard times. Trust me on this, I know how blessed I am. I know that according to the worlds standards, my children are spoiled. I know that my cupboards in my kitchen would feed a small village, even though my kids complain that there isn't anything good to snack on at times. And I won't lay it only on my children; I, too, am spoiled by the worlds standards. Sometimes I can't find anything to watch on one of our 6 televisions. But, by a small percentage of the world, we live like paupers. Our kitchen is slightly bigger than a hallway and our newest television is at least five years old.

2006 went out a little hard on me. Financially, physically... With my back out and not being able to move for over a week, it gave me way too much time to focus on myself. I'll openly admit, I got sucked into self pity. That led to many unwelcome emotions like fear, anxiety and depression. I wish it took as little time to get out of that rut as it does to fall into it. My perspective was out of whack. I may have pushed my blessings to the back burner, but they were still there.


It's up to me how I see my situation. Sometimes I see it in a desperate light, but thankfully those times are very infrequent and I honestly do reprimand myself when I fall into that pit of self pity. It happens to us all.

Hard times are brutal, no matter how good you have it. Whether it's financial and you've lost a job, whether it's getting your heart broken and having to start over in a world that's pretty damn scary, or whether it's your child being sick and feeling powerless to help them. Hard times are hard times, regardless of what you have or what you don't. We all have our personal burdens to carry.

One thing that I've found true in my own life is that the more I focus on others, the less I focus on myself. Maybe it's because I'm not bright enough to concentrate on too many things at one time, but the more I focus on others, the less time I have for self pity. Many people find that volunteering, or throwing themselves into projects that assist others help them to carry on when faced with tragedy's in their own life.

I am blessed. I've never watched my child's belly swell from hunger. I've never had to push the sum of my life in a cart down an alley looking for a place to sleep and stay warm for the night.

Call me poor...or call me spoiled. I suppose it depends on what you have or what you don't. Regardless of what you call me, poor or spoiled, call me blessed.