Live and Learn
Been over a week, and as much as I'd like to say I've been on vacation on a warm, white sandy beach, the truth is I've spent the majority of it in bed with a slipped disk and a lot of inflamed tissue sending me into screaming fits. But after a couple of days on a '21 - pack' (an anti-inflammation prescription), I'm up and hobbling along at an acceptable pace. I can't begin to express how much I've appreciated my kids. They've taken over the house doing all the chores, cooking, cleaning, and running errands without ever having to have been asked. It would be impossible to count how many times they've asked if there was anything they could do for me or get for me, and every time I've thanked them, it's been the same reply from both, "no problem". Regardless of what I've done wrong in my life, they are something I got right.
This is a picture of what my sister-in-law, Gail, made me for Christmas (I know it's poorly taken, best I could do without a ladder in my condition, so hush). I love it so much. She found a great place for it in my home while she was here, in my entry way. She makes and decorates the crosses and the name plates, and she said mine should go at the top because I'm the head of my family now. I'd never thought of it like that, and it's all that more special to me because of it each time I look at it.
I also like how Casey and Charlie's names have so much in common. The scripture that accompanies Charlie's name plate , Joshua 1:9 (Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest) has always been one of my favorites and is something I remind myself of daily.
Y'all know there has been a lot of changes and some trying times going on in my home this past year. Some of the hardest for me is when I see it through the eyes of my kids. That's the toughest. Even though I try to shelter and cushion them from the harshness of what life has thrown at us lately, sometimes I see what it's done to them and it hurts. Breaks my heart, really, but I know that I can't keep them from seeing what's going on around them, and that it's all part of life and the learning process. However, as a loving parent, I just wish they didn't have to learn some things.
A few Sunday's ago at church we had communion and as they were passing it around, Charlie told me that he wasn't sure he should take it. When I asked him why, what he told me still tears at my heart. He said that he wasn't sure how he felt about God and being called a Christian anymore. Of course I asked him why, and he told me that it was because the people he'd always believed were strong Christians and claimed to love God so much had really hurt him, and he didn't know what he believed anymore. I asked him if he was talking about me, yeah...the 'me' mentality, but he said no and what he told me later...well, broke my heart.
And...then there is the thing with Casey and his car at Christian Brothers Automotive. I don't know if I told y'all this before, but the reason we took his car there in the first place was because when it was time for both of our cars to have their oil changed, Casey said he wanted to take his to Christian Brothers instead of where I've always taken our cars, to Goodyear in Allen, because he thought that as Christians we should support one another. Christian Brothers always has different scripture or biblical references out on their sign, and Casey looked them up on-line to see if they were Christian based. Well, their web site claims they are. Casey has learned a hard lesson this past month, and just like the lesson Charlie is learning, I wish I could have protected them both from what life teaches us in our own time...but even as a loving parent, you can't (and shouldn't) protect them from everything.
The lesson...people are people. Regardless of what label we may sew on to the shell of the person we are, whether we call ourselves Christians, believers, rich, poor, loving or kind... in time all will be revealed. In time, we can't help but reveal our true character. The only way to judge a person is by their fruit (their actions) and not by what label they pin to themselves. Sad, but true. There will be many that will deceive you, but it's important to not let the downfall or the the disappointment of others distract you from the way you should go.
Charlie took communion that Sunday, and I saved the cup that he drank from because it's the day that my baby chose to walk in his own light and not let the shadows others have cast keep him from doing so.
Casey...well, wisdom comes with experience, if you choose to learn from it. He has.
This is a picture of what my sister-in-law, Gail, made me for Christmas (I know it's poorly taken, best I could do without a ladder in my condition, so hush). I love it so much. She found a great place for it in my home while she was here, in my entry way. She makes and decorates the crosses and the name plates, and she said mine should go at the top because I'm the head of my family now. I'd never thought of it like that, and it's all that more special to me because of it each time I look at it.
I also like how Casey and Charlie's names have so much in common. The scripture that accompanies Charlie's name plate , Joshua 1:9 (Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest) has always been one of my favorites and is something I remind myself of daily.
Y'all know there has been a lot of changes and some trying times going on in my home this past year. Some of the hardest for me is when I see it through the eyes of my kids. That's the toughest. Even though I try to shelter and cushion them from the harshness of what life has thrown at us lately, sometimes I see what it's done to them and it hurts. Breaks my heart, really, but I know that I can't keep them from seeing what's going on around them, and that it's all part of life and the learning process. However, as a loving parent, I just wish they didn't have to learn some things.
A few Sunday's ago at church we had communion and as they were passing it around, Charlie told me that he wasn't sure he should take it. When I asked him why, what he told me still tears at my heart. He said that he wasn't sure how he felt about God and being called a Christian anymore. Of course I asked him why, and he told me that it was because the people he'd always believed were strong Christians and claimed to love God so much had really hurt him, and he didn't know what he believed anymore. I asked him if he was talking about me, yeah...the 'me' mentality, but he said no and what he told me later...well, broke my heart.
And...then there is the thing with Casey and his car at Christian Brothers Automotive. I don't know if I told y'all this before, but the reason we took his car there in the first place was because when it was time for both of our cars to have their oil changed, Casey said he wanted to take his to Christian Brothers instead of where I've always taken our cars, to Goodyear in Allen, because he thought that as Christians we should support one another. Christian Brothers always has different scripture or biblical references out on their sign, and Casey looked them up on-line to see if they were Christian based. Well, their web site claims they are. Casey has learned a hard lesson this past month, and just like the lesson Charlie is learning, I wish I could have protected them both from what life teaches us in our own time...but even as a loving parent, you can't (and shouldn't) protect them from everything.
The lesson...people are people. Regardless of what label we may sew on to the shell of the person we are, whether we call ourselves Christians, believers, rich, poor, loving or kind... in time all will be revealed. In time, we can't help but reveal our true character. The only way to judge a person is by their fruit (their actions) and not by what label they pin to themselves. Sad, but true. There will be many that will deceive you, but it's important to not let the downfall or the the disappointment of others distract you from the way you should go.
Charlie took communion that Sunday, and I saved the cup that he drank from because it's the day that my baby chose to walk in his own light and not let the shadows others have cast keep him from doing so.
Casey...well, wisdom comes with experience, if you choose to learn from it. He has.
19 Comments:
Hey Kath, I'm so sorry about your back and the pain you're going through. Been there, done that, meds were great, but it sucks to have your back out.
I know you all had a trying time this year, but I do believe that God will see you and your family through ...
You're in my prayers and thoughts as always!
Love you! xxoo
Thanks for sharing. Those are painful lessons for your boys to learn but it makes strength eventually. And they are ones that my boys will eventually have to learn (my older one has already started to I think).
And that is such a cool idea with the nameplates - I would love to have Scriptures for my boys. Did you chose those or did they come with a meaning book?
Hang in there.
edith
I read most of that post, and it was one of your best. You may need to hurt your back more often, as it helps your writing. I can crack your back if you need help in that arena..hehe. Glad you are getting better.
Everything will be ok once your back on your feet. I know you have great kids, trust me, and I LOVE the cross. It is so beautiful. And yes you do belong on top (me behind u..jk) Hope you feel better and good luck with Casey's car
xoxo
Abi
deb ~ girl, I love you and am always thankful for your prayers. And, yup, 07 is an excellent year for my family!
edith ~ I always say parenting isn't for cowards, it's painful watching them get hurt and there is more to getting hurt than just the physical...emotional is just as hard.
The name plates, my sister in law, Gail, has a book with the meanings. I've never seen one, but I love what she made for us! I can ask her if you'd like, send me your email addy and I'll let you know.
tom ~ guy, you've made the last few days bearable with all your silliness. You mean the world to me and whether you take the time to read all my drivel or not, you're one of my best buds.
abi ~ darlin, you're such a sweetie. Thanks for caring so much about us. Love you!
What an awesome gift, I know you must love it!!
Sorry about your back, I hope that you are feeling better soon, but once again your boys have shown what amazing people they are!!
It breaks my heart about Charlie not wanting to take communion, and he's not even my son. It is a hard thing when people who are Christians (or just say they are) let you down. But you said it the way it is...people are people, and no matter how strong of a christian one might be, sometimes we fall, and bring others down with us. I will be praying for Charlie that the Lord will show him that He is the only One that any of us can truly count on!!
michelle ~ exactly, and that's my prayer for Charlie too. Thanks for all your support and for caring so much. I really do appreciate you.
Kathi
I hope you will be feeling all better very soon. What wonderful sons you have the way they were there for you!
Whenever I come here and read about your great family, it always warms my heart! I can feel how much love there is!
What a beautiful gift the cross is!
Take care Kathi!
God bless!
Margie
Love the gifts. Very neat! How did you slip a disk? I was wondering what happened to you this past week. I just assumed you were busy enjoying the holiday. Oh I hope you get back to full speed quickly.
As a mother, I understand how your heart hurts for you boys. Life isn't easy, and that which doesn't break us makes us stronger (as you well know!).
With such a good start from their mother, your boys will get stronger by the day!
God Bless you all, and may 2007 smile on you!
Beautiful gift, what a thoughtful idea!
I'm so sorry your boys have had to learn some tough lessons so early in life. They and you are very lucky that you have such good communication together.
slipped disc! ouch! I hope that you are feeling much better darlin' ... *smooches*
Hey there.....sorry you don't feel so good. This is a tough topic. One of the most frustrating things is being disappointed by other Christians. We have to remember that we are all human and make mistakes. But that has nothing to do with what we believe, and who we believe in. We as a society, often try to define the creator, by evaluating His creation. But that's not who He is. This world is a fallen world, and it's tough to get through without disappointment. God is consistant, we are the ones that change.
It is hard to recognize that we are surrounded by people who don't follow the old "actions speak louder than words" saying. The same is true of God. You can accept Him and say you devote your life to Him. But if you turn around and outright lead a life or perform actions that are against what Jesus showed us was "The Way" (as it was called before "christianity even became a term!!), then how can you truly follow Him?
Sorry about your back. Sorry also that your kids are learning these hard lessons, although it certainly sounds like they are coming through it beautifully and with a great teacher, I might add.
head of the household now. what a responsibility.
That was a really thoughtful gift. I like, I like. I hope your back heals. I have a best friend with a slipped disk.
I hope your up and about by now and running races with the boys.
I hope that everything is OK with you Kathi. I'm prayin' for ya girl!!!
Hey Kath. I just wanted to check in on you to see how you were doing. Hope everything is alright. We all miss you!
xxoo
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