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MY LIFE AS I LIVE IT

I'm a single mom with two great kids living near Dallas, Texas. This is my life; day to day things that are probably only important to me. This is my record of my ups, my downs and the road that I've taken along the way. For whatever reason YOU'RE here, I hope you find something you can enjoy and/or relate to. God bless.

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Location: Dallas, Texas, United States

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Before you know...they're grown.

Eleven years ago, Charlie (then 4 years old) and I walked Casey into the elementary school for his first day of kindergarten. I'd been looking forward to my boys starting school so I could actually have a few hours without a child anywhere near me, and with Casey starting kindergarten...I was half way there! Yeah, I know, mother of the year... Just try to focus here. So Charlie and I are walking Casey into the school to his first classroom. I'm telling him how proud I am of him, trying to make it easier for him, as he takes off running into the classroom leaving Charlie and I out in the hall. Not even a nod of acknowledgement in my direction. I peek into the class and he's talking to other kids, no problems at all. Charlie and I start walking back out of the building when the oddest thing happened. I started crying. Where in the hell did tears come from?? I'd been waiting for this day since Casey was two days old. I'm passing people in the hall, Charlie's holding my hand, and I'm trying with every ounce of my being to keep from breaking down and sobbing like an idiot. We get outside the school and I reach down, picking Charlie up and holding him as we walk to the car. I get him settled in, I get behind the wheel and I lose it. I start crying, some might call it sobbing, but I'll deny it. I feel Charlies sweet little hand rubbing my arm. I look over at him, wiping my eyes and he said "Don't worry Mom, we'll get him back". I'll never forget it as long as I live.

Yesterday, Casey and I scheduled the classes for his senior year of high school. He's got a 3.5 grade average and only needs 3 credits to graduate, but he's going to take some electives. And yet, he'll still have 3 off periods a day. I can't believe how he's grown into such a great young man. This 6'1", 170 lb., 16 year old young man sitting next to me, teasing me, poking me in the ribs trying to get me to not take it all so seriously...this is my son. I am so proud of him. I was already in the schools library waiting for him, so I was watching as he walked in. Tall, handsome, full of confidence and such a sweet smile on his face. He didn't see me. I watched girl, after girl stop him on his way back to where we were meeting. Each time he'd give them a hug. When he got to where I was sitting, 'hey Casey' came from every direction. It's one of the few times I've gotten to see him in 'his element', and it made me smile. This is my son. As we started planning his next year, we laughed and had fun. Occasionally, I'd get serious, thinking about it being his senior year, but then he'd get me laughing by telling me that he was thinking of taking Tallenettes (sorta like dancing cheerleaders) or an aerobics class. I love this kid.

This is a picture I took of the boys on one of their breaks last year when the three of us went to San Antonio for a week. We were having dinner on the Riverwalk. I told them to lean in and let me take a picture of them to send home to their Dad. This is what I got. This is nearly always what I get. That's why, my friends, I'm so happy with my life. Casey is 18 months older than Charlie. They are the best of friends and the worst of enemies. Eleven years ago I walked Casey into a kindergarten class, or at least I tried to, as he ran into that new adventure waiting for him in that class room. Yesterday, I'm helping him schedule his senior year, preparing him for college. Reflecting back on it now, as I write this, I'm wondering who is preparing whom. Regardless of all the wrongs I've done in my life, parenting is something that I got right.

Babies Grow
Babies grow
and before you know...
they're little boys and girls.
With baseball bats
and cowboy hats
or dolls with lots of curls.

At first they cry,
then learn to whine
till a tantrum they can throw.
But you know they're good,
they just misunderstood
what you meant when you said "NO".

They try to crawl
and then to stand,
next they're walking on their own.
You hold them tight,
you say good night
and before you know...they're grown.

by me, kfmb :)

41 Comments:

Blogger Nikki Jo said...

I know I know, we all grow up so fast don't we? I just can't believe those 2 have grown so much, and into wonderful young men...I'm so proud of them both! Please tell them that for me. And WOW, he looks great in his football picture, I'm sure all the girls are lining up for him :)Have a wonderful day, love you!!

9:34 AM  
Blogger kathi said...

nikki ~ I love you too. You're responsible for how they turned out too, you know. We all have an impact on one another.

9:42 AM  
Blogger Shawn said...

Oh, look at you Mrs Sentimental. I am sorry I mean Mrs Hallmark.

10:25 AM  
Blogger Georgiapeach said...

Kathi have they read this? This is so beautiful. How fortunate are they to have a mother like you. Truly fortunate.

Love the pictures. Your sons are so handsome. What are you going to do about the ladies..lol.

Beautiful poem.

12:04 PM  
Blogger ~Deb said...

So weird that you posted this today. My oldest sister was over with her daughter who is ready to go into kindergarden---and my sister says, "Sophia, what's mommy going to do when she puts you on the bus for school?"

And Sophia says, "You gonna cry mama!"

My heart exploded because I know I'm gonna cry once she goes into school. I remember feeding her when she was a baby and taking her to the park at age one...

They grow up so fast. Now----she calls me a 'pain in the ass'...I guess she's learning fast. *sigh*

I do think as they get older, they then become your best friends....(hopefully)

Beautiful post!

12:36 PM  
Blogger kathi said...

shawn ~ silly guy. Hey, been meaning to drop you an e...still will. But wanted to tell you I saw 'Peaches'. :) :)

gp ~ no, I wrote it when they left for school this morning. Thanks for the very kind words. Hey, if you think they're so handsome and if you don't mind younger men... Just a thought. I mean, after all, I am 5 years older than my hubby and it's worked out.

deb ~ How funny is that...I call you a pain in the ass too!!!

12:46 PM  
Blogger Nikki Jo said...

PS, that is such a cute picture of them when they were little. I just love the look on Charlie's little face... "what you lookin at?!" lol

12:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

HOW CUTE IS THAT!!!! We have seen them both grow into young, good looking men. I have to agree with Nikki everybody does grow up one day. Some go the right way, but some go the wrong, but I am positive you taught your kids to go the right way. Tell Casey that I am VERY proud of him, and of course Charlie too. Lots of hugs and kisses XOXO for all of you.

love you,
abi

1:55 PM  
Blogger Leesa said...

First, I loved your post today. "Don't worry Mom, we'll get him back". How precious is that.

And the poem is so . . . sweet.

2:24 PM  
Blogger Memphis Steve said...

This was a great post. You make me all the more aware of my own lack of kids. I wish my parents had been as proud of my accomplishments as you are of your son's. You sound like a great mom.

2:33 PM  
Blogger Mike said...

What a great post! I remember a friend telling me about the time she dropped her 1st born off to school on the 1st day.

She broke down and cried....'then skipped all the way home'

And yes...Isn't Deb a pain in the ass?...*snickers*

4:21 PM  
Blogger kathi said...

nikki ~ Charlie still has that look on his face, lol.

abi ~ awww, thanks darlin. Again...you and nikki helped in forming their characters.

leesa ~ I'm glad you liked the post. Yeah, that was a great line from Charlie. I have a lot of 'Charlie' stories. They even told 'Charlie stories' in Marks dads eulogy...stories we didn't know people knew, lol.

steve ~ what a sweet thing to say, thank you.

mike ~ thanks. And yes, deb is...and so are you. *double snickers* :) :)

5:08 PM  
Blogger joey♥ said...

we need more moms like you in this world :).

6:13 PM  
Blogger kathi said...

joey ~ how sweet, thank you!

6:52 PM  
Blogger Mike said...

Yeah joey...kathi is 'ggod' people...and one helluva mom!

'Cept when she says certain "someone(s)" are a pain in the ass...lol

7:32 PM  
Blogger Mike said...

*good*...even

7:32 PM  
Blogger joey♥ said...

i love ketchup on my eggs! i've never tried it on potato chips, but i'll have to try that.

8:12 PM  
Blogger Wes said...

Well that was a cool little quick chronology.... followed up nicely with yet another "tune"

Very nice. Hope things are well down there in the big TX!

8:28 PM  
Blogger Casually Me said...

kathi is a keeper....this is for sure...

8:50 PM  
Blogger kathi said...

mike ~ lol, thanks

joey ~ really? you don't many people who put ketchup on eggs...let me know what you think of it on chips.

wes ~ hope you liked it.

casually me ~ how sweet...so are you babe.

9:59 PM  
Blogger Mike said...

I realize I'm a little late in the game here....but for some reason I feel compelled to guess fanny may?

Now that's gotta be worth a prize of some sort...(sticks tongue out at Deb)

11:08 PM  
Blogger bbsgirl said...

I cried when my son got on that school bus for the first time too...it's funny but when we watch them grow up we get mushy...it's just what mom's do..lol I loved your other son's comment that you'll get him back..how prescious is that.. I love the poem.

4:41 AM  
Blogger kathi said...

jan ~ our traveling birthday girl!! Welcome home, and though I'm sorry you've had to come back to reality, it's good to see you again. Yeah, I know you can relate to this post. :)
Hugs hon.

6:05 AM  
Anonymous katy said...

I too remember that first day of school. I guess because I didn't want him to be scared and to know what to expect on the first day, we did a practice first day when the school was closed. We went a few days before and looked in the window I told him his teachers name, showed him the playground the whole bit. First day we get to the school I get out of the car and I go around to the back of the car to get him out of his car seat close the door to the car and he says "bye Mom" and started of across the parking lot by himself. I of course stopped him and explained that I still needed to hold his hand till we cot to the curb.

In six months Andrew will be starting college, I don't think he is going to let me hold his hand anymore, no matter how tight I try to hold it.
With a little luck and a lot of hard work we both ended up with some awesome boys!

Katy

6:12 AM  
Anonymous Katy said...

I would love to have the poem with one of your pictures in a frame for my art room. I already have two of your works of art hanging there.

8:40 AM  
Blogger kathi said...

Okay my best buddy, which poem and which pic do ya want? You're bday is in a few months...

8:45 AM  
Anonymous Katy said...

I want the Babies Grow poem! I don't know which picture their all good put one with it that you think works the best. That would be awsome!

9:36 AM  
Blogger Casually Me said...

They play football in Texas? I had no idea...haha

11:14 AM  
Blogger BigBill said...

I have not been on your blog for a while I do apologize... When I do come back to your site there is always something good to read..
This one especially... I know excactly what you mean when you talk about how quick they grow up and wanting to make sure you spend time with them while they still want to. i am taking Erin my 12 year old daughter up to ski this weekend. yes daddy daughter date weekend which we do a couple times a year in the winter. I always try to get at least one time with Her and I only. this will be the weekend we do that. We go and ski all day and hit the ski lodge for some lunch and hot chocolate. Then we ski some more and about 4:30 we are finished and physically tired. So we head to the cottage and get in our comfy clothes and order a pizza for her and chicken for me and watch movies as long as we can stay awake. Its a good time for one on one and to let her know I am a cool dad and she loves it. We also have the boat in the summer and we go up alone and fish sometimes by ourselves sometimes. These are times she will cherish and never forget and I see you have those times with your sons... Thats priceless.
I promise to stop by your site more often.. Sorry to be so laxt in my attendance..Please don't hate me.
Peace Big Bill

4:14 PM  
Blogger Grace said...

Wow, that was a great post! The more I read about you, the more I get to loving you Kathi. You're such an AMAZING person. Your family is so lucky! :)

7:29 PM  
Blogger echotig said...

why must you make me cry?

8:51 PM  
Blogger Nabeel said...

how cuteee .. i'm planning to keep an album too like this for my kids .. u know when they're young i'll take pictures and when they get old .. get married i'll give 'em an album full of pictures (when they were young)

poetry was once again a pleasure to read

10:41 PM  
Blogger Tom Serafini, Actor to the Stars! said...

So lemme guess, you didn't go through the, "I hate you both now gimme the car keys" phase? You got lucky!

11:54 PM  
Blogger Mike said...

MOM!!....You simply must have a word with your 'daughter'....she is still picking on me.. *sniffles*

9:56 AM  
Blogger ~Deb said...

Big wimp that you are. Mom will never approve of this. She just called me a pain in the ass---do you see the vulger language coming out of Mrs. Hallmark? I'm shocked!

12:33 PM  
Blogger kathi said...

katy ~ you've got it, and soon you'll get it. :)

casually me ~ only 24/7...lol.

bigbill ~ don't be silly. I need to visit your place soon as well.

amazing grace ~ wow, don't know what to say. Thank you very much. I am going to miss your blog very much.

echotig ~ sorry, I didn't mean to.

nabeel ~ that's definitely something I can see you doing. And, you'll be great at it too.

tom ~ noooo, and I rebuke the thought that I ever will. :) Lucky? Yes... Blessed? Most definitely.

mike and deb ~ to your rooms, and no t.v.

5:06 PM  
Blogger crallspace said...

My mom takes it personally that I didn't grow up to be a non-question, devout Christian and Republican. Tough titty, I say.

5:09 PM  
Blogger kathi said...

crallspace ~ sorry to hear that there's a problem there. It's sometimes really hard for a parent to want something so much for a child (young or grown) and not see it happen. But, you're your own person and I hope she see's you for the great guy you are. My mom and I were barely on speaking terms until I was around 28...but she became my best friend.
Hugs.

5:29 PM  
Anonymous blackops said...

This post reminded me of something I was thinking about the other day--everyone knows the Harry Chapins song, The Cats in the Cradle--well I was reflecting on how that song plays a part in my personal life. So your post made me think of that again. I also have an unbelievable story I could tell about the Chapins but I wont cuz its just too frikkin unbelievable. So I will let that one go.

9:16 AM  
Blogger Tom Serafini, Actor to the Stars! said...

Um...I ain't getting any younger...

6:13 PM  
Blogger kathi said...

blackops ~ I'd ask you to share...but I know you won't unless you want to.

tom ~ yeah? Me either.

7:13 PM  

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